Tag Archives: Advice

Say Goodbye, Say Hello

Hampton Cruiser This is the semi-nostalgic tale of what came to pass that fate-filled afternoon where I found myself parting ways from my trusted and beloved Hampton Cruiser (pictured there <—) and coming to terms with newly-acquainting myself to a freshly pressed basket-less Electra.  Before we get too far into the melodrama, let me clear the air and admit that the Midtown Drinking Machine is still securely tethered to a tree in my yard.  BUT it has a non-functioning system, most crucial to its ability to role me through the mean streets of midtown.  Not to mention many other, what lay-folks would call horrific, brief yet momentous all original rage induced fits of stupendous, umm…occasions?  So you can imagine.  No, seriously, please do imagine.  I’m a fan.

It all started one Saturday when that guy JoshGZ called to tell me he and his financier (I mean fiancée ) were on their way to gather their bicycles from my yard and I should thus ready myself for a trip we’ll call a pedal <insert noun here> crawl.  blah blah blah, I get to gearing up my bike which I’ve neglected most of the winter months and realize it needs a new tube on the rear wheel.  A bit of grease on the hands, a few dead bugs living in the tire, and several minutes later, I’m ready to inflate the new tube.  No problem.  Except, in my haste, I failed to realize I’ve used a substandard piece which, when inflated to pressures acceptable to the old tube, cause the new tube to explode.  Literally, explode.  It was loud and exciting enough for both my neighbors to the east and to the west to peak over the fence and assess my well-being (they’re what average people would call "responsible" adults).  Needless to say, I was in a hurry and now further aggravated with my lack of preparedness for said impending adventure.

Enter brain’s idea to walk the two and a half blocks to the bike shop and buy whichever single-speed cruiser is least expensive  (and I don’t know what it is about the folks pedaling the flat streets of Sacramento that makes them believe they require more than one gear to get around, but please all be to WTF that we can’t carry more than one single-speed cruiser that isn’t meant for the non-junk having female rider.)  My brain isn’t always at its best, but it was the best idea I had at the time.  As if to imply it was too much work to purchase the correct tube and spend another few minutes switching it out.  Uhh…yeah, that makes a whole lot of sense.

Enough rambling, and long story short.  I’d been dreaming up excuses to buy an Electra since the summer of 2007, and here we are on the cusp of summer 2009, so it was inevitable.  I made an impulse decision to make an impulse purchase and settle for a shiny new plain bicycle (pictured below) for which I overpaid.  So it goes.

Electra Rat Rod

Don’t get me wrong, these Electra bicycles are of higher quality than my Hampton Cruiser, but they lack character.  It’s backwards.  You can’t buy character, it’s created.  Electra, outside of their basic models, panders to an imaginless audience (wait, I mean an audience that lacks imagination), incapable of creating interesting behaviour.

Don’t be boring.  Express yourself.  Say "goodybye". Say "hello".  And throw something.

###

Don’t Stand For Being Seated

It’s true, I can’t handle folks who speak from a seated position when presenting to an audience from what should be an authoritative stance.  If you have the stage, then you should control the stage and all the space that goes along with it.  I suppose this is a problem more for panel presentations where there are a few, um…experts, sharing the spotlight.  But if it’s not the Q&A portion of the show, whoever is speaking should stand up and shout to the back of the room, even if there are only seven people in the audience.

When it’s my turn, I’ll ask (for the sake of being polite) the moderator if it’s okay for me to stand because "I have a proclivity for exaggerated gesticulation when I present that is greatly hindered from a seated position."  In which case everyone is confused and the moderator replies, "yes, that would be fine."  (Well, many people are confused most of the time by nature, which has little to do with my presence or line of questioning.)  So I take the floor, the mic, the remote (PowerPoint), and whatever else I need so as to ensure everyone is not only watching, but also listening, because I’m the expert and you all better be paying attention.

Let’s get serious here for a minute, this is an issue of confidence, not to be confused with arrogance, that by standing to demand attention tells the audience you’re worthy of their time and attention.  (Or at least you believe yourself worthy, and most likely rightfully so.)  The truth being that everyone knows something other people don’t.  And if someone has invited you to present your knowledge and experience, then that person values your time and attention.  So don’t cower to the crowd and hide in the shadows.

The same can be said for the audience.  Please get off your ass and stand up to ask your question so that the entire room can hear what you’re saying.  (We have two hundred people in the room tonight, can you please repeat the question.)  There’s a pretty good chance that your concern is shared by others, and if it’s not, then you should be pelted with rotten tomatoes.  But don’t take it personally.  Learn.

And I could go off on another tangent (but I realize I’m already rambling on) about how people are too…well, let’s just leave it at that.

Your knowledge is valuable — stand up and share it! Kick your chair, too, if you’re really feeling the power of controlling center stage.  Oh yeah

###

Don't Stand For Being Seated

It’s true, I can’t handle folks who speak from a seated position when presenting to an audience from what should be an authoritative stance.  If you have the stage, then you should control the stage and all the space that goes along with it.  I suppose this is a problem more for panel presentations where there are a few, um…experts, sharing the spotlight.  But if it’s not the Q&A portion of the show, whoever is speaking should stand up and shout to the back of the room, even if there are only seven people in the audience.

When it’s my turn, I’ll ask (for the sake of being polite) the moderator if it’s okay for me to stand because "I have a proclivity for exaggerated gesticulation when I present that is greatly hindered from a seated position."  In which case everyone is confused and the moderator replies, "yes, that would be fine."  (Well, many people are confused most of the time by nature, which has little to do with my presence or line of questioning.)  So I take the floor, the mic, the remote (PowerPoint), and whatever else I need so as to ensure everyone is not only watching, but also listening, because I’m the expert and you all better be paying attention.

Let’s get serious here for a minute, this is an issue of confidence, not to be confused with arrogance, that by standing to demand attention tells the audience you’re worthy of their time and attention.  (Or at least you believe yourself worthy, and most likely rightfully so.)  The truth being that everyone knows something other people don’t.  And if someone has invited you to present your knowledge and experience, then that person values your time and attention.  So don’t cower to the crowd and hide in the shadows.

The same can be said for the audience.  Please get off your ass and stand up to ask your question so that the entire room can hear what you’re saying.  (We have two hundred people in the room tonight, can you please repeat the question.)  There’s a pretty good chance that your concern is shared by others, and if it’s not, then you should be pelted with rotten tomatoes.  But don’t take it personally.  Learn.

And I could go off on another tangent (but I realize I’m already rambling on) about how people are too…well, let’s just leave it at that.

Your knowledge is valuable — stand up and share it! Kick your chair, too, if you’re really feeling the power of controlling center stage.  Oh yeah

###

Be Clear Be Obvious

The downside to not being on the ball and taking immediate action when it hits you is that someone else is probably going to beat you to the punch.  Maybe they’ll do a better or worse job, maybe they’ll do exactly the same job.  But they’re doing the job, and you’re left to kick yourself in a crowded parking lot at two in the morning on a Tuesday night inevitably asking yourself, "How the fuck did I let this happen?"  I don’t know.

Shortly after finishing a nine-month-long leadership course in 2007 I quit my then current job and started working with Thompology in a tiny attempt to find personal freedom.  This got me to start thinking about marketing which lead me to thinking about branding.  Sadly, I didn’t fully understand either until it was too late.  However, I did eventually coin the term "Be Clear.  Be Obvious." for my personal slogan, and I never shared it with anyone, at least not until early August 2008 when I shouted it out while jay walking across a street in Portland, Oregon at two in the afternoon.  (Why then?  I don’t know.)  So there it was.  My mantra.

Not even a full week after returning from Portland, Mr. Calacanis was at it again with his newsletter and emails a four thousand plus word writeup about PR and sums up his branding philosophy in six little words, "be amazing, be everywhere, be real."  Talk about very strange timing.  The only proof I have that I said mine first is the couple of witnesses jay walking with me, and I won’t incriminate them.

Essentially, it took Jason six words to say what I said in four.  Except I forgot the most important piece — "be amazing."  Very crucial and probably the part I take most for granted, which is likely why I completely glossed over it.

Calacanis has been at this quite a bit longer than I have, but that’s not a good excuse.  So take what you can from what either of us said, and learn your lesson.  Be Clear Be Obvious and to drive home what JCal said, be totally fucking amazing.  The rest will follow.

PSI Basic, Basically Bull *Sigh* Seminar

I recently had the opportunity to attend Basic in San Francisco from PSI Seminars.  (PSI stands for Personal Success Institute, and is pronounced “sigh”, as in the Greek letter.)  This is the first in a series of three seminars, roughly totaling a grand sum of $11K and requiring about 21 days of your life.  (You can take as much time between seminars as you like, but you get discounts if you sign up sooner.)  If you opt in, there’s a serious commitment.  To take the Basic will cost you about $600, which is where they weed out crazy people and anyone not interested in further self-exploration.

The creators of the program have cultivated a self-help pyramid scheme with a side of cult-like following.  It’s amazing, frightening, and all around intriguing.  It’s usually someone close to you that will lure you in, inviting you to one of their graduation ceremonies from one of the three seminars.  These graduations are more sales pitch than graduation ceremony.  You think you’re showing up to support someone close to you in his accomplishment and you come out having been pressured into signing up for Basic.  (Some graduates believe so strongly that the program is what others need, that they will shell out the initial payment for someone else.  That’s how I arrived.)

The solution they provide, regardless of what anyone finds wrong with himself, is that we have our parents to blame.  In some way, the obviously awful and difficult life we are living now is because of our parents, and where we fall short is also because of them.  Busted relationships?  You didn’t get along with mom or dad.  Fear of commitment?  Mom or dad didn’t accept you.  Problems with addiction?  Mom or dad was an alcoholic.  You get the idea.  And after they get you to accept and believe in blaming your parents, they ask you stop blaming your parents.  “You have the power now to choose.  Choose not to carry resentment, which leads to resistance and revenge.”  Holy crap, everyone is cured.

But wait, there’s more.  We can’t really cure ourselves in just four days.  If you want the healing to stick, you must sign on to the next show, where you can go deeper and really break up the programming we and our parents spent so many years putting into our heads.  A lot of the time during the first four days is used selling the next seminar, and telling everyone how great it is.  To reinforce this statement, graduates from the programs are available all weekend (volunteering) to answer questions and support you in your decision to sign on to PSI Seven, the next seminar.

Obviously their tactics aren’t as blatant as I’ve made them to be, but I use exaggeration to make a point.  It’s an emotionally exhausting weekend for many people.  You’ll laugh, dance, chat, sing, connect, and cry.  The facilitators are preying on people who, a) believe they have lost control of their lives, and b) people that  think they don’t belong anywhere.  Many leave the first class believing they’ve scratched the surface to recovery, and they want to break all the way through.  Handing over a few thousand dollars for this is a very small price to pay, and you’ll make some friends along the way.

I’ll tell you what, and here’s the deal — rather than shelling out a bunch of cash and throwing away valuable days of your life, invite me to coffee, buy me an Americano, and ask me to listen before I respond.  It’s the best gift I could ever give you.  OR you can watch the Last Lecutre by Randy Pausch .  (Randy passed away July 25, 2008, and this lecture made it on to the Google Search home page.  It’s that good.)

Let me wrap this up as plainly as possible:  I am not a fan of PSI Seminars.  Stay away.

Monitor Web Text With ChangeDetection.com

In a continually changing and growing web world, you’re undoubtedly going to encounter web sites with information useful to you, but that are not regularly updated.  In these instances, you don’t want to spend a load of time remembering to check in periodically, or risk missing something great because you forgot to check in.  Even if you do remember to make the site visit, not all web site’s provide handy aggregation the way sites like Facebook or Myspace do for allowing a follower to keep up on what changes are being made to which pages.  Still, there are times when you want to know about a change and being late could cost you a bunch of money.  That’s where ChangeDetection.com comes in.

Change Detection Logo

Not too dissimilar from Google Alerts, ChangeDetection.com (CD) monitors specific web pages (not to be confused with entire web sites), rather than specific terms.  Once a day it makes a visit to each site you provide in a list along with specific change-monitoring criteria, compares the latest view with the previously cached view, and sends you an email if anything new has appeared or disappeared.  A major time saver.  Especially if you have more than two handfuls of pages you’re monitoring.

A couple of potential drawbacks, but by no means deal breakers: 1) CD does not monitor changes to images or flash, only text; and 2) You have to enter each frame of a frameset to be monitored, even if it’s all one page.  So you can see where you might need to do a bit of tweaking to get things working in a way that will prove useful.

I’m typically monitoring government agency sites for updates to program regulations, application announcements, and changes to lists of events.  ChangeDetection is awesome for this type of activity, and has again proved that there are time-saving uses for the Interweb.

Read the CD FAQ for more information.

It's Being Done Differently Now

It was time.  I had to do it.  I changed the site layout, or “theme” as it is referred to in the loop.  I’m announcing this obvious fact for the folks in the feed-readers; they can’t see a layout change.  For the most part, at least.

Anyhow, like I was saying.  It was time.  The previous layout was too dark and difficult to read (look at.)  I’m not a fan of sites that use light-colored text on dark backgrounds.  It doesn’t make any sense to me.  Don’t get me wrong, I like the _look_ of it, but it does not read well.  If you’re planning to have anyone read your stuff, it needs to be easy on the eyes.  I don’t want to get into a long UI discussion (although, maybe I should), but trust me when I say that this new layout is much better.

I’m not sure if the spark for change came from a talk I had with a fellow blogger, or a conversation I had with a colleague about her business’s web site.  Probably it was a combination of the two and, either way, it sent me out tinkering with all sorts of pre-developed WordPress themes.  (An added bonus to using WordPress is the many site layouts that are freely available for personal use.)  After several hours of working with Gimp and creating my own CSS from scratch, I decided it was a better idea, and also much quicker, to mash together a bunch of already existing lines of code.  (Why re-invent the wheel, just make it more round.  What?  I mean make it roll farther.)

This was only half my problem.  I spent a bit of time this evening, searching for a reason as to why my PHP was not working with WordPress 2.6, which I had hesitantly upgraded the site to late Monday evening after trying it on another site I host.  2.6 was working great everywhere I used it, with all my plugins in tact and new features working flawlessly.  But then I loaded up my new layout, which, silly me, I was testing locally on a linux box running WordPress 2.5.  (Imagine that!  It was working in one set of conditions, but not another.)  “Warning!”  “Error!”  “the function() requires a string at line 18.”  Oh my.

What I’m getting at, is that there are going to be some kinks for a few minutes, and I’m doing my best to work those out of the mix.  So, if you would be kind enough, bear with me a minute or two, and, if you notice any errors, please draw them to my attention so I can remedy the situation.  I’m just getting back into the old smell of PHP and, honestly, I was never a CSS fan.  However, it’s proving to make a whole lot of sense now that I’ve plopped myself in the world of web site development. (Is it still a client if you do the work for free?)

I’ll leave you with it so I can get back to it.  My next goal is to clean up the tags and categories.  Both of these are useful tools when used correctly, but we’ll have to let that sit a moment.

It’s Being Done Differently Now

It was time.  I had to do it.  I changed the site layout, or “theme” as it is referred to in the loop.  I’m announcing this obvious fact for the folks in the feed-readers; they can’t see a layout change.  For the most part, at least.

Anyhow, like I was saying.  It was time.  The previous layout was too dark and difficult to read (look at.)  I’m not a fan of sites that use light-colored text on dark backgrounds.  It doesn’t make any sense to me.  Don’t get me wrong, I like the _look_ of it, but it does not read well.  If you’re planning to have anyone read your stuff, it needs to be easy on the eyes.  I don’t want to get into a long UI discussion (although, maybe I should), but trust me when I say that this new layout is much better.

I’m not sure if the spark for change came from a talk I had with a fellow blogger, or a conversation I had with a colleague about her business’s web site.  Probably it was a combination of the two and, either way, it sent me out tinkering with all sorts of pre-developed WordPress themes.  (An added bonus to using WordPress is the many site layouts that are freely available for personal use.)  After several hours of working with Gimp and creating my own CSS from scratch, I decided it was a better idea, and also much quicker, to mash together a bunch of already existing lines of code.  (Why re-invent the wheel, just make it more round.  What?  I mean make it roll farther.)

This was only half my problem.  I spent a bit of time this evening, searching for a reason as to why my PHP was not working with WordPress 2.6, which I had hesitantly upgraded the site to late Monday evening after trying it on another site I host.  2.6 was working great everywhere I used it, with all my plugins in tact and new features working flawlessly.  But then I loaded up my new layout, which, silly me, I was testing locally on a linux box running WordPress 2.5.  (Imagine that!  It was working in one set of conditions, but not another.)  “Warning!”  “Error!”  “the function() requires a string at line 18.”  Oh my.

What I’m getting at, is that there are going to be some kinks for a few minutes, and I’m doing my best to work those out of the mix.  So, if you would be kind enough, bear with me a minute or two, and, if you notice any errors, please draw them to my attention so I can remedy the situation.  I’m just getting back into the old smell of PHP and, honestly, I was never a CSS fan.  However, it’s proving to make a whole lot of sense now that I’ve plopped myself in the world of web site development. (Is it still a client if you do the work for free?)

I’ll leave you with it so I can get back to it.  My next goal is to clean up the tags and categories.  Both of these are useful tools when used correctly, but we’ll have to let that sit a moment.

Focus Your Site Content

I have a tendency to wander around town from time to time, which often ends me up in some sort of new and strange conversation with another voice that results in a lot of time being used to talk about nothing.  While these experiences can be entertaining, they are not always the greatest use of my time.  (Not that I know what that is either.)  Sometimes, though, I have semi-useful conversations with folks I know better than others, and that is a good use of my time while still entertaining.  I recently ran into an editor friend from the Sacramento Business Journal and she gave me some feedback after viewing the site, essentially saying two things to me: 1) Write more, and; 2) Focus the content.  Sound advice, no doubt.

The first of the two is an easily reachable goal.  I have a habit of writing down whatever I can remember in whatever order it is remembered.  As time goes on, I’ll use more and more of that writing for the site and we’ll have plenty of entries.  This is the problem that makes difficult achieving number two.  (What?) As it stands now, the site has no real focus other than to humor me, possibly entertain you, and be not always nonsensical.  Not the clearest set of instructions, right?  It makes sense, but what does it mean.

I understand the need for focus.  People don’t like ambiguity.  They don’t want to be taken to wandering all over the place, essentially wasting a bunch of time to ultimately, probably, accomplish very little if nothing at all.  You’re going to want content with clarity that is concise.  That takes most of the fun out of it for me as the writer.  So the questions now are — Do I get focused?  How is it done? Possibly (I don’t want to rule it out completely,) and here’s how it’s done:

  • Clearly Defined Goal(s) Know what it is you want to accomplish with your content.  For example, “maximize revenue per unique visitor to the site through conversion”  Be specific.  Be clear.  Knowing exactly what you want to do will help you determine how you do it.
  • Know Your Topic It’s much easier to focus and be clear when you yourself are knowledgeable and interested in the topic you’re covering.
  • Get to the Point Quickly It’s a bad idea to fumble around in the first paragraph.  Say as much as possible as soon as possible about your topic.  Make sure the reader knows straight away what the rest of the post is going to be about and why he should continue reading.
  • Relevant Photos We tend to enjoy the visual, so include photos and be sure they have something to do with your topic, potentially aiding in the further explanation of what you’re trying to communicate.
  • Omit Needless Words Remember what William Strunk, Jr. taught in The Elements of Style, Rule 13 — Omit Needless Words.  It can’t be said enough.  Proofread your writing and remove fluff.  Don’t write about the writing.  Write about your topic.

That’s it.  There you have it.  A quick start guide to getting some focus.  It sounds easy enough.  Doesn’t mean it’s easy to do.

My editor friend suggested I write about Sacramento since I’m out and about so much.  It makes sense, and I have some Sacramento entries.  But I also want to write about “nerdy computer stuff” as she worded it.  I’ve been tinkering and hobbying around the computer world since the late 80s, and I studied Computer Science at Cal Poly.  I get a kick out of the latest developments to hardware and software, so I’m going to write about that stuff.  And let’s not forget that sometimes I just want to write and write and say nothing at all.  I’m sure you won’t mind.